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The End

August 9, 2011

Once upon a time there was young girl who wanted nothing more than to meet the members of Team Starkid, a magical posse of marvelous performers. Unfortunately, these wonderful people lived in a faraway land known as Chicago, and the young girl had no way to get there. She didn’t even have her permit yet (at that point in the story. She has one now.).

So, she begged her father, a powerful warlock, to transport her there with magic. After minutes and minutes of pleading, he finally gave in to her request, on one condition.

You see, the warlock was under a spell that hindered his powers. It was a curse known as The-Curse-That-Must-Not-Be-Named to many, or Blogging, to those brave enough to speak the name. If the girl’s warlock father was to transport her to the land of Chicago, then he would be allowed to transfer the horrible hex to her for one full week. The warlock would walk freely, unburdened, while the girl was forced to complete dangerous tasks and write about them on the internet for all to see. But, not knowing the full consequences of the Curse-That-Must-Not-Be-Named, the girl foolishly agreed to the deal, and was allowed to meet the children of gaseous, celestial bodies.

After having a totally awesome experience with the Starkid gang, the girl returned home to her normal life. She nearly forgot about the deal, but the week during which the Curse would be placed upon her crept slowly closer. Before she knew it, her father was making her an account on WordPress, and the curse was transferred. (DUN, DUN, DUUUUUN!)

On the first day, the girl’s task was easy enough. She simply had to push the button on the food processor. It used magic to turn oil and eggs into a delicious sandwich spread, which her family devoured in the form of egg salad. On this night, the Blog was still lenient, it gave her material to write about, and she wrote a post that was longer than it needed to be.

On the second day, her warlock father helped her to mix lots of sugary ingredients together into a creamy custard. Then, they ran into a problem. They wouldn’t be able to eat the delight on that evening! There wasn’t enough content, and the Blog still had to be written! The girl thought and thought, and eventually she decided to write about their recent trip to Hell’s Kitchen, during which they were given ingredients by the Devil himself.

On the third day of her Curse, the girl had to climb a mountain of shrimp to get to the crème brûlée at the top. It was a treacherous ascent, but she made it to the top, and ate the caramelized sugar. On this night, she also received a new piece of magic that would help her throw of f the Curse for the evening. With her new device in hand, she conquered that night’s blog.

The next night, she was given the most difficult task of all. She had to eat delicious seafood while there were warm ciabatta rolls sitting next to her. It was a torturous event, but she finished her meal and lived to blog the tale.

On the fifth day, she had to chop vegetables for hours and hours to make a fresh salsa that tasted good with robots. But this was not enough for the Blog. She was also forced to recall hilarious quotations from Team Starkid, the source of all her cursed misery.

Six days into her week-long curse, the girl was left with nothing to blog about. She anxiously scrambled for some small part of her life  that she could tell to the internets, before the Blog attacked her and drained her of her powers (for she, too had powers, but they were not nearly as developed as her warlock father’s). After a very long time, she finally remembered her trip to the East that was beginning a few days later. She hadn’t been excited about it at all, so of course she had forgotten about it completely. She completed the Blog fairly quickly.

On the seventh and final day that the Curse was to be upon the girl, she was scrambling around; packing and feeding turtles and doing math, with hardly a minute of her day left during which to blog. But, finally, she found a spare moment and began to tell her tale. She recounted each day’s adventures. She reminded her readers how magical Starkid and Harry Potter were. And how musically delicious crème brûlée was. And how very exciting Pottermore was. And with that, she concluded her final Blog.


Damn Heartfelt Goodbye of the Week: Goodbye, family, friends, neighbors, and random people on the internet who read my father’s blog! Thank you for the comments!

6 Comments leave one →
  1. August 17, 2011 1:32 pm

    I have enjoyed reading your posts!

  2. August 14, 2011 4:37 pm

    Really enjoyed all of your blogs… hope it’s not the last time we see you out here in WordPress Land! Great job Mel!

  3. August 12, 2011 1:27 pm

    Awesome, magical post! One of the most creative I’ve ever read on WordPress, or anywhere else!

  4. Patti permalink
    August 10, 2011 2:15 pm

    Later that day, a helpful Muggle wisked her away to the Delta Broomstick Garage, and then she was off…”Have a wonderful time!” cried the Muggle. And with that, the Starkid disappeared into the maw of the Garage. Hopefully to be heard from again, when once again the Warlock with the power and the Magical Cookbook is called upon for travel help.

    It’s been fun!

  5. Mary Jo permalink
    August 10, 2011 1:50 pm

    Nice, nice job, Melanie. Have a swell trip! Mimi

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